Emotions...Bringing Me Back to Sharing

After a long season of not feeling 100% on a daily basis and not knowing how I wanted to express myself or use this blog, I am led to give a synopsis of the past year and half. It won't happen all today, but over the next few days. I am reminded of the flood of emotions I felt in the midst of taxing relationships.  Much of those emotions were brought on by my wanting people to do what I thought was best for them or what I wanted them to do.  It is freeing to release that.  Share from your experiences, share what the Lord leads you to say, but the end result is theirs.  It is much easier to love someone and support them where they are when you release the expectations you have for them and how you think they should live their life.  There is something to be said about experience and wisdom, and when people appreciate that it definitely has a positive impact, but if they don't, that's okay, too.  You spoke. You shared.  If they choose their own way, you can choose to love them anyway, condemn them, or let them go.  Choosing to love them doesn't say you agree with them or approve of their choices, but it does tell them that they are worthy of grace.  If we accept the grace Jesus has given us, how can we not extend that grace to others even if they don't do things exactly the way we would want them to?  I choose to share my experience and my 38 year old wisdom, to speak truth, and to love them even if their choices seem disastrous.

Releasing control of people has been a struggle!  Sometimes I really do know what I'm talking about. Sometimes I can see that the results of their choices are going to lead down a difficult path.  In the end, it's not my path.  I have to accept their choices and choose my reaction.  I've had to acknowledge that I am a manipulator.  I try to make things happen a certain way.  It seems good to me so the end result should be exactly like I want and how I picture it. Ha! My ways are not His ways.  My path is not someone else's path.  Thankfully, there has been breakthrough in this area of my life and  I can love people where they are and encourage them to grow.  I can't make them do that, but I can encourage them.  Encourager.  That's me.

It's also been brought to my attention that I am a peace keeper rather than a peace maker.  Speaking truth can shake up the peace, and that is uncomfortable for me.  Sometimes, we are (I am) called to speak truth that someone doesn't want to hear.  I hate conflict and not just between myself and others, but also between others who are important to me. I've been a peacekeeper in my family for a long time.  If everybody could just understand one another, their relationships would be okay.  That was my thinking. Defend this person.  Defend that person.  Exhausting!  A common theme over the last year and half:  Speak the truth with grace.  Their reaction isn't my problem. Although I believe that, living it is still a process.  Feeling uncomfortable because what I say may not be received well even when spoken with grace isn't something I am fond of.  The Lord is not finished with me yet!  True peace is made when we are living in line with God's will for our lives.  Sometimes we are (I am) called to have a difficult conversation communicating where someone is missing out on true peace because of their misalignment with God's truths.  That is how we become a peace maker rather than being a peace keeper who tries to ignore any unpleasantness.

Emotions.  What a roller coaster!  A simple answer to supporting my emotions is essential oils.  I am so thankful for how I feel them working in my life.  Emotions is just one aspect of the change essential oils has brought to me and my family. I'll be sharing my story with Young Living essential oils over the next few days, as well as further updates on the entire Silly Twilley family.  I would love to share this journey with you.
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